Save Mothers from Nasty Daughter-in-laws

Save Mothers from Nasty Daughter-in-laws
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Are you a man getting married ? Then beware. Now, there is a law for
daughter-in-laws in India using which she can force her old in-laws
to go out of the house if it is a joint family.

Upon her request, the old and sick parents and even unmarried sisters
of the husband can be asked by CAW Police cells to leave the house or
provide separate house for the son and daughter-in-law.

If the old in-law's do not comply, then they can be arrested with non-
bailable warrents. It is not unnatural for the old and sick in-laws
and unmarried/pregnant sisters to be kept in jail for 5 to 10 days
till they get bail.

If you and your wife do not stay with your parents, still your wife
can complain to police that your parents are disturbing your married
life and insulting her. One single written line of complaint by your
wife is enough to put your parents and sisters behind bars.

Now a days, daughters are encouraged by fathers to go to police
station for any small marital problems. Many wives in urban india
become extremely upset when their husbands visits his parent's house
or even talks to them on phone. Encouraged by their fathers, these
wives complain to the police not knowing the exact implications of
the law. Police files the complaint and sends officials with arrest
warrents to arrest her in-laws and other members of the family. Now,
even if the daughter-in-law pleads not to arrest them, police will
not listen. This law called Section 498a is such that once the
complaint is filed, it automatically leads to non-bailable warrents
without any investigation or verification of truth. So, arrests are a
must and police can not do anything about it. So, old and sick
parents, even sisters of husband are put behind bars for 5 to 10
days. Once they get released, they refuse to take the daughter-in-law
back home. Many old in-laws have committed suicide after spending
time in jail due to complaints by daughter-in-law.

Old and widowed Mothers become extremely lonely after passing away of
their husbands. Now-a-days daughter-in-laws in India are demanding men
not to keep the widowed mothers and look after them. Please think
where will these old women go. There are incidents of very old mothers
either arrested or accused in false cases. Some are as old as in their
80s and 90s.

So, severe this situation in many pockets of India that World Health
Organisation(WHO) has specifically mentioned this injustice in its
report on Elder Abuse called "Missing Voices". It says

http://www.who.int/hpr/ageing/MissingVoices.pdf
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D) Legal and financial abuse

Legal abuse was named as a particular type of abuse in both India and
Lebanon, although each country has its own specific version of this.
The Indian _expression of legal abuse is through abuse of the dowry
laws by daughters-in-law:

In India, there is a law that is intended to protect daughters-in-law
from abusive in-laws. A daughter-in-law can go to the police station
and lay a complaint that she is being abused by her in-laws, and the
in-laws are arrested on her word alone. However, the focus group
participants reported that some daughters-in-law are using this law
as a form of elder abuse, by making false police reports. In general,
participants stressed that the lack of a caring attitude by daughters-
in-law was a major problem. (India)
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In some occasions, where the in-laws found that the daughter-in-law
has a previous affair and she still continues that affair after
marriage. Now, the daughter-in-law with her affair being exposed,
threatens to put her in-laws and family behind bars unless they shell
out a hefty 5 to 10 lacs compensations for the marriage to be
annulled.

Large number of such incidents are reported in Bangalore, in Kolkata
and Delhi. That has lead to a large number of online clubs and
websites which offer free help and counselling to people who have
gone through these nightmares because of daughter-in-law complaining
under section 498a.

Many judges including former Supreme Court chief justice K.N.Singh,
former Karnataka High Court Chief Justice and NHRC member Justice
Malimath have asked for changes in this law saying that the well
intentioned laws are grossly misused leading to severe injustice to
innocent old and sick people.

Now, US State Department has come out with a travel advisory on this
Human Rights abuse by Indian Daughter-in-laws after consulting with
its consulates in Indian and interpol.

So, what is the way out ?

1) One must be extremely careful in married life and must be aware of
all laws related to marriage.

2) If possible, make a pre-nuptial agreement. That can help a bit.

3) If you sense problems from wife or her parents, keep them happy by
giving them money by cheques etc.

4) If they start threatening you and your family, then approach
various groups offering help in internet in the area of section 498a
(or cruelty law). A large number of people who have gone through
nightmares will give you counselling and moral help without
suggesting you to go for divorce.

5) If they have already complained to police, then shift your parents
and sisters to some other relative's place which your wife does not
know. Never walk in to police station when police calls you. Always
send a lawyer to verify what is going on. If the complaint is filed,
then immediately seek anticipatory bail for parents, sisters and
yourself from a higher court. God willing you may get the
anticipatory bail and save your old mothers and unmarried sisters from jail.